Blog 32 Perceptions of Parenthood for Female vs. Male Lawyers

The perceptions of parenthood for female and male lawyers are changing with newer ways of thinking but still clash with traditional stereotypes. The first generations of women lawyers did not understand how difficult it would be to have their careers and raise their children until they realized that they would not receive help from anyone but themselves. The newer generations were condident that they could could balance both roles because they believed they lived in a world free of sexism, but they experienced a rude awakening. Men have seem the impacts of parethood as well, for they are learning that simply being the breadwinner does not cut it if they want to be good fathers (2003:221). Also they realize that they may lose face if they say they have to go and pick up their kids so they resort to hiding the impacts of their parenthood and just say they have to leave without giving a reason (2003: 250).

For example, some of the ways that traditional values of parenthood affects men vs. female lawyers deponds on their role. One woman is accused of being unprofessional when she announces her pregnancy; as if it was offensive that she could take on the male role of being aggressive and and competetive and also the female role of being a nurturing mother. One father describes his role as stay at home dad and how that is gratifying for him, but at the same time he has to deal with judgment from people at his wifes firm. A woman describes how she took on the role of stay at home working mom, and she could not handle because she felt like she was not getting anything done at home. This role contradicts the traditional values that a mother should posess the maternal instinc of wanting to be home raising her children.

This is experienced by many high powered female lawyers with children who are viewed as bad mothers. The understanding is that the time it takes to be a powerful lawyer is inconsistent with the level of attention that a child needs (2003: 222) so many people judge these womens parenting abilitities. They criticize her skills as a parent but making remarks like their kids must be screwed up instead of prasing her skills at being a great lawyer. To avoid this criticism some moms just downplay their career outside of work in order to maximize her “good mother” role (2003: 231). Or they will do the oppisite and downplay their mother role inside the workplace to avoid judgment that she is not a committed worker (2003: 232).

English, H. (2003). Gender on Trial: Sexual Stereotypes and Work/Life Balance in
the Legal Workplace. New York: ALM Publishing.